Are You Dealing With This Problem?

🤭Kya karoon oh ladies, Main hoon aadat se majboor ;)

Habits, What are habits? Well, a habit is anything you do frequently and almost instinctively, especially if it's something you find difficult to quit. Let's just agree to the fact that we are all habitual to certain things that are always in our routine, no matter where we are or what we are doing. We are just so used to those things that sometimes they can be the reason for conflicts, clashes, and disputes between you and your partner. Don't be like Ricky bhai 🫡.

Introduction

When you start to date someone and start living their lifestyle, you get to know a lot of things that you might not have noticed in the initial stages of your relationship. Habits do play a significant role in any relationship. Whether they are positive or negative, they can have a significant effect on how people relate to each other.

Compatibility and shared experiences are the lifeblood of a relationship. What occurs, then, when your partner's established habits begin to clash with your own? In a relationship, this psychological tug-of-war can lead to stress and annoyance. When you start to date someone and it's all new and fresh, you don't really look deep into their lifestyle-what are their habits, what is their routine, and all that. But when you start getting to know them and start living their lifestyles, you may feel a bit irritated if their habits clash with yours.

Short Answer: Yes, it is completely normal.

Both partners are two different individuals, and both have significantly different routines. What is not normal is that because of these clashes, your relationship is becoming toxic, unhealthy, and suffocating. Let's have a chit-chat on how you can keep the spark alive in your relationship and align love with the tug-of-war.

Common Habit Clash In Couples:

Early Bird Vs Night Owl:

The age-old debate: are you an early bird or a night owl?

When you are dating someone, it is really important to know what your partner prefers "a sunrise or stargazing under the night sky." Most of the time, the main cause of arguments, disputes, and conflicts between couples is their routine. One partner might prefer the calmness and silence of night, while the other partner would rather love morning and love to feel the first rays of sunrise. Being an early bird or a night owl, both have different schedules that align with their lifestyles, but sometimes people are so used to their schedules that they don't even try to fix them, which can lead to conflicts between you and your partner.

Clean Freaks Vs Messy Wizards

This is the most common clash that occurs between couples. Most of the time, in a relationship, women prefer more tidiness and hygiene in comparison to men (the roles can reverse too). Where one partner wants every little thing to be organized, and on the other hand, the other partner doesn't even make an effort to put the things where they belong. This can be a major reason for conflicts between you and your partner. For some people, it is a major turn-off too, especially for women.

Social Butterfly Vs Wallflower:

What is your pick?

This trait of a person is something we get to know in the initial stage as well, but there are still some chances that you don't have any idea how much more extroverted or introverted a person is. One partner might want to hang out most of the time, while the other partner might prefer staying in and spending quality time together.

For every social-butterfly, there is a wildflower with nectar (LOVE in biological terms)

The Challenges Of Clashing Habits

Are you feeling like your relationship is changing? or are you questioning yourself, "Is love still there or not?"

To be honest, there are always some or the other challenges that every couple comes across. What matters is how and if you are willing to overcome them. For now, let's look at a few challenges that you may encounter:

Annoyance And Frustration:

Sometimes even the little things, like a wet towel on the bed can make you feel irritated and frustrated. It is a very little thing that may be you don't like it, but your partner is habitually doing it even before you both were in a relationship. A lot of times these little things leads to bigger fights and arguments creating tension between you and your partner and producing a feeling of annoyance and irritation for you as well as for your partner. Even after constant reminders, if your partner isn't willing to adjust and improve their habits, then it can create a feeling of not being heard, leading to frustration and annoyance.

Communication Breakdowns:

If you and your partner are having daily conflicts because of habits clash and you can sense the communication gap between you and your partner then it is  not a good sign of a healthy relationship. Disagreement with each other's habits can create a gap between you and your partner, which can create misunderstandings leading to bigger problems and conflicts. It is really important to listen to each other and find a common ground on which you both can agree.

Distance And Disconnection:

When habits clash on a daily basis, it creates a feeling of annoyance, frustration, and irritation, leading to a communication gap between you and your partner (not a good sign of a healthy relationship, trust me). All these things are interlinked with each other, and at the end, this can result in distance between you and your partner. Daily conflicts can decrease the quality time between you and your partner, resulting in you or your partner feeling distant and disconnected with each other.

Solutions For Coping With These Challenges:

Open communication:

As we all know, communication is the key. For a healthy, loving, and long-term relationship, communication is very important. Habit clashes are not something that can be resolved on their own. To resolve these conflicts, you and your partner have to sit and talk honestly and openly with each other. Communicate with each other regarding your individual routine. Understand each other's point of view with calmness and come to a conclusion that is good for both partners.

Find Common Ground:

Disagreements are normal in any relationship. Without disagreements, a relationship is not a relationship, as both partners have different personalities, different points of view, and different opinions. What matters is that even after disagreements, you and your partner try to find a common ground on which you both can agree. To avoid clashes, it is important to find a common ground on which you and your partner can agree on.

Respect Individuality:

Every person gets used to something which they have been doing for a very long time, and it becomes a habit. In a relationship, it is also very important not to pin- point every little thing your partner does, unless it's a negative thing. Forcing your partner to adjust according to your routine and trying to change their entire lifestyle is not a good sign of a healthy relationship. It shows the dominant nature of one partner over another.

Plan Quality Time Together:

It is really important to have that quality time with your partner for a healthy and long-lasting relationship. Plan some quality time each week to be involved in the things you both enjoy doing, regardless of your own routine. For the night owl, it might be a game night, while for the early riser, it might be a good yoga session. This will not only help you spend time together, but it will also help you both understand each other's habits.

Conclusion:

For a healthy, loving, and long lasting relationship, communication and understanding are the key elements or I'll say these elements are just like salt, Just like salt is important in any food item, communication and understanding are also important.
It's not necessary to share the same behaviors in order for a relationship to succeed. A good relationship is one in which both partners work together to improve each other schedule.

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