Friend Or More Than A Friend?

When a close connection with someone begins to spark feelings beyond platonic camaraderie, it prompts a question that can echo in the heart and mind: Are they just a friend, or could they be something more?

Friends, more than friends, less than love,  platonic friendship, idyll
What do you think? 

Tingling sensations, sweet words—innocent friendship or something more? Come and join me as I talk about the delicious uncertainty. Here's your checklist to know if maybe a friends-to-lovers trope is in the cards for you!

Preface: Honest Self-Reflection

More often than not, we tend to deny ourselves of something just because the thought of it makes us uncomfortable. Spoiler Alert: Just because some feelings are inconvenient does not mean that they don't exist.

Acknowledge the truth, that being your attraction to your friend, if any. Even embrace it. Denying the truth is going to lead to another tragic tale of unrequited love. In a nutshell, don't shy away from your feelings. It's natural to be attracted to someone who vibes well with you. The main catch is figuring out the distinction between a romantic attraction and a platonic one. Once you have that down, trust me, there's nothing stopping you from living your version of "Yeh Jawaani Hai Deewani"! Come on and let's make that friend-to-lovers trope happen for you!

Your Guide To Knowing!

Now that we have that covered, let's move on to the real issue at hand. How to know?

Craving Time With Them

One of the telltale signs of blossoming relationships is wanting to spend every empty second of your life with them. Whether it's something as simple as watching a movie or going bowling, you'd want to fill your hours with them. And while it is possible to want that in a totally platonic friendship as well, it's more likely that you're attracted to the said person. Friends-to-Lovers is all about realizing the fact that the mere presence of that person is enough to soothe your soul and mind!

Meaningful and Intimate Conversations

There's nothing more attractive than a person who listens and provides insightful and meaningful input to your daily conversations. When you can trust another person with the darkest parts of yourself and be the most raw and unfiltered self in front of them, they become more than your best friend. They become your solace, and that kind of emotional connection is the most beautiful foundation for a relationship. That's the best part of the friends-to-lovers thing; sharing love with someone who already knows you inside and out.

friends-to-lovers, idyll
Friend Or More Than A Friend?

Physical Affections

Physical touch is something that feels uncomfortable and cringe-y when coming from someone you don't want near you. On the other hand, long hugs, forehand kisses, cuddling, or pecks on cheeks from the right person can be oh-so comforting and delicious. If your friend’s touch conveys feelings of warmth, affection, love, and desire, you better believe it's more than just a platonic friendship.

Remembering Little Things

The major prerequisite to the lovely trope of friends-to-lovers are the subtle and little gestures that make you realize how attentive your ‘friend' is to your needs and wants. If your friend makes you feel special by, say, remembering your go-to burger order, playing your favorite songs, taking you to the most romantic and dreamy places, or holding your hand because they know that it gives you all the feels, you better know that it's destined to be the kind of love as beautifully cheesy as a hallmark movie.

Daydreaming About Them

Oh boy! I bet y'all are guilty of this. Watching Titanic and creating your very own Jake-&-Rose scenarios with your crush. Well, the moment the hero or heroine of your fantasies comes to be replaced by your ‘friend’ is the beginning of you falling for them. Always Remember: Love first materializes itself in your subconscious. When you start wanting things there, you start wanting them in reality too.

The Friends-to-Lovers Litmus Test

This is actually a good way to figure out for yourself if you're romantically interested in a person. If the idea of stealing kisses from someone or being committed to them makes you want to gag, then it is definitely not meant to be. But if you can imagine it, and, dare I say, enjoy it or derive some thrill from it, then you better believe that this friends-to-lovers trope is your destiny for the better.


Feeling jealous or protective when your friend hangs out with someone else might mean you have a crush on them. If the idea of them with a significant other that isn't you sends a bolt of jealousy and envy through your heart, or if their being in trouble feels as if it were your own problem, then, my dear friend, it's definitely more than just friendship. Possessiveness is one of the most common things people experience when it comes to someone they are in love with.

However, there is a lot of difference between being possessive and being jealous. Gotta be mindful of that, folks!

Is It Worth It?

Now that you know all the boxes you need to check in order to come to terms with your feelings, it's time for the million-dollar question, "Is It Worth It?"

Let's delve into this more. Finding someone with whom you share the greatest joys and gems of your life is the most beautiful and unique thing you'll experience. It's like your black-and-white world suddenly becomes colorful and brighter. That, right there, is the gift of a friend.

Is It Worth It?

Imagine feeling so full of life and happiness every day while waking up next to your best friend, having cozy movie marathons as you both come home from a long day of work or going to a fancy restaurant for a much-needed date night after a stressful week. Ask yourself this. Will that feel good? Will I forget every bad thing in life in their arms? Can I imagine him/her in that special place with me?

If yes, then let me tell you something: Each time you inhale and exhale, you're in danger of dying (not to be morbid). But you do it anyway because it's worth the risk. See what I did there? Here's your answer.

It is worth it. A true friendship can never crumble but definitely evolve into something deeper and more beautiful. Take a leap and make it happen. Not to get too cheesy, but sometimes you have to help the universe conspire against you, maybe making you a little uncomfortable or getting you to face your harsh and severely inconvenient feelings. Take your fate in your own hands and all that. Make that friends-to-lovers scene happen. Remember, you are one of the few people who are blessed with a special love and connection; don't let it slip through your fingers.


This is it for my completely Hallmark-ish yet helpful tips for how to know if you're friendship stops feeling platonic. This checklist is universally applicable and works every time. Look out for small and subtle gestures, as well as those feelings of jealousy and possessiveness.  The friends-to-lovers is one of the dreamiest tropes ever so if you can have that, why not take the leap.  And remember, in the end, it will be worth it!

To delve into more such blogs, connect with Idyll.

Download Idyll: The Perfect Dating App!